YOUR FACE IS MADE OF BREAD

Every urban homesteader should be able to make bread and after 5,000 failed attempts, I've finally figured it out.



INGREDIENTS
240g warm water*
16g/2 tbsp oil
28g/2 tbsp honey
26g/2 tbsp brown sugar
10g/1 tbsp milk
6g/1 tsp salt

360g strong white bread flour
2 tsp instant/easy bake yeast

Some butter for greasing the tray.

*yeast works optimally at 30-37 °C (86-98.6 °F), above 37 °C they become stressed, according to Wikipedia.

METHOD
Combine first 6 ingredients in a large mixing bowl. Stir.
Add flour and yeast, and knead until it's mixed up well and that's all.
Place dough in an oily bowl, turning once to grease the top.
Cover with a clean towel and put in a warm place, let rise until size doubles.
Punch dough down. Knead a little and form into loaf shape.
Grease a baking tray with butter, put the loaf on it, and let rise in a warm place again until it doubles in size again.
Preheat oven to 190 °C (374 °F). Bake for 35 minutes on a low shelf.
Remove loaf from oven, allow to rest on a wire rack. When cool, slice it up, eat.

Notes:
Greasing the tray with butter works much better than oil.
You don't have to knead the dough. Let the yeast do all the work.
Getting the water to the right temperature makes a huge difference.

I don't use loaf pans but you might want to try it. In previous experiments, I've found that the middle doesn't cook well with a loaf pan and there's still alcohol left over. With this method, there's a lot more surface area for the alcohol to escape from, the taste of which indicates a less than successful bread.

Other people who write about breadmaking always say they could never go back to store-bought bread and I've always thought they were aloof for saying so. But I'm feeling the same. After you make and eat this stuff, store bread looks and tastes like shit in comparison, like they're tried to make something as bread-like as possible without actually being bread.